I see diets are all the rage. I think I survived the onslaught of Christmas and New Year food excessis, though the talking scales refuses to give me my weight, instead electing to hurl insults at me until I get off. Still, it does seem to have come from the same place that Dave Lister bought Talkie Toaster from.

In truth my ‘diet awareness skirt™’ has informed me that my arse is becoming dangerously like two badly parked Volkswagons. I have to think thin and squeeze buttocks to get into it. As I seem to put on weight first on my bottom, that tells me it is time to cut back.

I find dieting a chore. I don’t do fads, so instead I have a technique of removing temptation. The trick is to always eat just before you go shopping. It’s amazing how much less junk and luxury food you buy when not hungry in the supermarket. I’ve also mostly cut out bread products these days because of Zoë being unable to eat wheat (a loaf of bread is too much for just me to eat, so I go without) which does make a big difference without feeling too much like a chore. I’m also trying to exercise more by using the car less. It would work better if it wasn’t so cold and icy. Still, we’re off for a mooch around Manchester today. Hopefully more than a few extra calories will get burnt. Hopefully…