Doesn’t time just flash on by? Well, it’s been a busy old week at work on planning the wedding. I hadn’t realised quite how close (and therefore tense) it’s getting. Not to mention expensive. It’s not that we’;re going over the top, it’s just colour something ivory and call it ‘bridal’ and the gougers charge three times the price.

The snow that everyone is whinging about has still not fully reached Bolton. I think we’re the only place that has not had any. We never get the fun weather here; only rain, hard frosts and drizzle. Lots of drizzle. I would just love the kind of snow where you get snowed in. That’s the best kind. The stuff that leaves you snowed out, well that can be a pain. Late last year I was nearly caught out by that kind somewhere north of Thirsk. I found out what that little air freshener thing was all about in the cab that day I can tell you. Ever wondered what it feels like to be driving a 44 ton articulated lorry on a dual carriageway at forty-five miles per hour then realise that under the wheels is now just ice? I’ll tell you what it feels like: sh!t-your-knickers scary. I made it home though, which is more than can be said for a lot of the imbeciles that they allow to drivwe a car in this country. A bit of snow, and the morons come out to play.

I remember coming back from a rock gig in Manchester years ago. It had snowed heavily whilst we were in there, and the biggest obsticle to getting home to Bolton was not the actual snow, but the morons who decided it was really clever to dump their cars in the middle of the main road just because it had snowed. We made it without incident all the way to Bolton, and the guy whose car it was subsequently drove over the A666 all the way to Blackburn safely too. It beggered belief why the idiots dumping their cars as a road hazard were not able to get through either. We had to drive on the hard shoulder and, at one point, the wrong way around a roundabout to avoid being stuck behind dumped cars.

Of course, if your car does get stuck in the snow, don’t ask these boys to help you get unstuck if you value your car.